Watching People F*ck: What I Learned, UFO Encounters, & Acts Of Kindness
REFLECTION OF SELF:
Robotic. Beautiful. Vapid.
That’s what it was like to watch 2 people fuck on stage in Amsterdam.
Let me back up.
My partner and I decided that we would go to Amsterdam for the weekend, about 2 weeks ago. We explored the food, canals, mushroom shops, the best that Amsterdam had to offer. But we left out one obvious location: The Red Light District.
So, we said “fuck it” and purchased two tickets to watch people fuck themselves with dildos and also fuck each other.
The walk through The Red Light District felt like something out of a Hunger Games Sexual Dystopia. The women either swayed their bodies and hips enticingly through the windows or stood like statues on display.
Seventy percent of the people who walked the streets were men.
Now, I have nothing against sex work or people who pay for sex. Despite the hate it gets in the media, I see sex work as one of the most honest industries on the planet.
Most of the time, a man pays a woman an agreed-upon amount, the man gets off, she gets money, and it’s an upfront exchange of value.
How many times does a guy pay for an expensive dinner, the woman fucks him because she feels like she has to, and both are left feeling disconnected?
The world is full of sexual transactions in disguise.
The mask doesn’t exist in sex work.
Back to the walk through the Red Light District. I don’t know what the ideal “marketplace” for sex work is, but it’s not The Red Light District.
Maybe I would have felt differently in my late teens, early twenties, but walking through it now as someone slightly less stupid with slightly more experience the place felt devoid of everything that makes sex great: connection, playfulness, communication, and sexiness. It did have good-looking people, but it didn’t feel sexy to me.
I believe that we can get to a place where sex work includes the best parts of sex.
It doesn’t have to be an underground, outcast industry.
If someone wants sex and is willing to pay for it and someone else is willing to accept that offer, and it harms absolutely nobody, why not?
I know there are a ton of ethical, political, and social issues surrounding the sex trade. And there are people much smarter or aware than me in this area who see things differently.
I don’t know what this modern, more fulfilling version of sex work would look like, but it is worth exploring.
It may lead to a better understanding of sex and why we crave it so much, and maybe even help with porn addiction.
Enough sex work talk, for now.
I can’t just mention that I saw two people fuck and not go into details.
So, as I said, me and my partner went to a sex show in Amsterdam.
It was at Casa Rosso Theatre, and boy does it look like a theatre, Broadway-style.
Red curtains, red velvet seats, ushers. Though these ushers had neck tattoos which may make things difficult to get hired on Broadway.
The whole thing screamed “theatre.” A sort of empty, slightly dirty, theatre full of horny men speaking different languages, but “theatre” nonetheless.
A woman in black leather appears on the stage.
She looks Hispanic and she’s attractive.
She begins to dance around the stage, like a stripper routine but with no pole. Slow, graceful, elegant movements.
Then, she turns around, her darker back contrasted with the clubby, flashing lights providing a background on stage.
Removing her top she spins around to reveal her breasts and lifts her legs up in a way to show that she isn’t wearing underwear.
Bam! Dildo in her fingers.
She begins to insert the dildo into herself slowly, then rapidly without showing any signs of pleasure on her face. She looks more like a magician looking into the crowd to gauge excitement about her latest trick.
What followed was much of the same.
Dildoes in pussies, tops off, dancing seductively, and it felt emotionless, dirty, sexy, and somewhat beautiful.
One woman did pull the Netherlands flag out of her pussy. I suppose if I knew the Dutch national anthem, that would have been as good a time as any to put my hand over my heart and recite it.
That all lead up to the main act: the sex.
As the curtains opened, a man and a woman, both good-looking, spun on a circular, velvet bedpiece as the woman blew him.
The man then went down on her before changing positions into missionary, doggy, spooning, and then back to missionary with some light head to finish it off.
While these people were spinning on stage fucking in front of a crowd full of couples, creeps, and the rest, I started to think about the weekly regimen of a job like this.
6 nights a week.
4 shows per night.
Getting on stage and fucking thousands of times in front of people you’ll likely never see twice.
Some of these people have been doing this for decades, and it shows. At times, it looked painful. The most surprising thing to me was at no point during the show did I get even the slightest boner.
I’m normally easily aroused and spent 2 hours watching beautiful people fuck themselves and each other without the slightest blood flow to my nether regions.
Sure, I had a few drinks, but surely I should have been turned on.
Maybe it was the robotic, mechanical style of the performance that kept me in a state of awe rather than arousal.
And even the awe didn’t last long.
After 20 minutes I was over it and even fell asleep halfway through.
The reason I’ve stayed so engaged in past art performances is that the musician, dancer, or singer loses themself in the act. There’s a point where a great performer blends into the performance and the two become inseparable.
I didn’t feel that at all watching the sex show in Amsterdam.
And it’s nothing against the people on stage.
Maybe we weren’t meant to watch people fuck.
I don’t know if it’s possible to lose yourself in an act as intimate as that in front of 200 people watching your every lick and thrust.
With that being said, go see the show if you’re interested. I don’t regret it and it’s an experience.
If anything, it made me appreciate the past sexual experiences I’ve had even more because the show showed me how special a true connection really is.
Maybe the reason porn is so harmful is that you get used to watching people come together mechanically, and when it comes time to connect with someone in the flesh the lack of intimacy you’ve become accustomed to on-screen is blown to pieces.
Your cock rises for the robotic and becomes flaccid in the face of real intimacy.
Again, these are my thoughts.
Hopefully, these thoughts spark some deep thinking from you and others who read this.
Nothing is permanent. I don’t write to be right.
I write to reveal parts of myself that may be a small help to others.
Cheers.
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QUOTE TO LEAVE YOU INSPIRED:
Wordsworth also said that the best part of a person’s life is “his little, nameless, unremembered, acts of kindness and of love.” - Amy Poehler
Source: Yes Please
Cheers,
Zach